Dear Inday Malu: He is Short in Height and Hates Himself For It

He is Short in Height and Hates Himself For It

Dear Inday Malu,

Please call me Benj. I am sick and tired of being teased for being short for my age. I am 23 years old but I only stand 4'11". I am always mistaken as a student. Worse, either as a high school or as an elementary student! Several times already when I got into trouble because I could not tolerate being made the butt of jokes, even by my co-employees or my friends. /p>

One more thing, Inday Malu. Right now, I have a crush on our neighbor. Just call her Mylene. I am worried because she stands about 5'4". We are close friends, and when we walk together, I look like her mascot. Most people think I am her 'younger brother' and it is very annoying! Sometimes, I want to get mad at my father. We have the same height and he said it is hereditary. I feel so self-conscious and this is why I want to be alone most of the time. Is there anything about this frustration? Thank you so much for whatever advice you can give me.

Respectfully yours,

Benj V. of Granada, Bacolod City

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Dear Benj,

Before you condemn yourself or your father for the height problem you have, think first of heroes or heroines, those iconic figures who helped shaped the history of this world despite their being short in height. Yes, you are right, height is hereditary. Thus, there is nothing that can be done once you reach way past puberty age. Personally , I am not a believer in synthetic medicines promising growth in height, hence my apology for not recommending its usage. However, the best you can do is to change your perspective about yourself.

The first step is to accept that you stand at 4'11" and it is part of being the real YOU! Then, enhance your personality, excel in whatever endeavor you do, work on your talents and skills, and widen your circle of friends by improving your communication or public relations skills. When you speak authoritatively or do anything with expertise, usually people will pause and listen to or observe you. You can command respect then.

By showing open-mindedness and sportmanship, you can charm your way to the hearts of your friends and acquaintances. They will tend to overlook your lack of height and see more of your positive qualities as a person. You have nothing to prove to the world and you never owe the world any explanation for standing not-so-tall just to live up to others' expectations.

Getting into trouble will not change anything, except make it worse. Take the line from a Kenny Roger song, saying "It takes a stronger man to walk away from a fight." That's one sensible advice! /p>

II have met awesome couples despite the wife being a hunchback with her good-looking husband or a cross-eyed husband with a wife who was a beauty title-holder. It proves that with unconditional love, physical appearance should never be a hindrance to your goal of happiness with your beloved. It's good that you and Mylene are close friends. Mylene would be proud of you more if you are a matured and charming person, you bet. So, you really have to start working on your change of attitude now and do it fast. That's a tall order, yes, but you can do it, Benj! Be better, not bitter. Cheers!

Your friend,

Inday Malu

(To our readers, you may email me your problem thru [email protected] or send your letter to Negros Daily Bulletin, Door A-1, Esteban Magdalena Bldg., Hernaez St., Bacolod City,Negros Occidental)


(GREETINGS: Happy NDB reading to Dr. and Mrs. Gil and Maricar Octaviano III and children, to Dr. & Mrs. Gil and Femia Octaviano Sr. and family, Dr. and Mrs Franklin Tumaneng and family and Mr. and Mrs. Ric Toribio and family, all of Bacolod City.)